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What baffled us about the Superbowl

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There was a point, in the early hours of Monday morning, sometime after my last wing and just before the broadcast finished, that I began laughing. I began to imagine the next ridiculous moment that could occur, completely contrary to my previous experiences of sporting events, and lo and behold, the television would provide. From ridiculous endorsements to the unbelievable manner in which the trophy was handed over, the Superbowl was a series of baffling experiences. Sharing my thoughts with fellow writer Philip Buckingham, it soon became clear as the match progressed that watching this match was akin to watching a Martian broadcast for the two of us. Comparisons with the FA Cup final became prevalent. Two young men talking about our fears for the future of football. What follows is a comprehensive list of the more ridiculous features of the Superbowl.

The Constant Endorsements and Advertising

You’re watching the half-time show sponsored by Bridgestone tires. You’re watching the punditry sponsored by the Whopper. Finally, the match ends, and you’re watching the MVP presentation, sponsored, endorsed and with prize provided by Chevrolet. Already following the first fit of laughter, the manner in which the camera panned slowly to the Chevrolet as Eli Manning was announced as Most Valuable Player was shocking enough. I then made a mocking comment as to how they could announce the Chevrolet sponsored MVP award, but what occurred was even better. Without missing a beat, the interviewer told Manning that despite the fact he had flown to the game, he was going home in a brand-new Chevy, provided kindly by ‘The Chevrolet Corporation’. It was not enough to feature the logo of this brand in one of the closing shots of the presentation, but also to point out that, intrinsically, the game’s best player is Chevrolet related. This is worthy of mockery, but there are clearly reasonable fears that the same issues can occur in football. Simply looking at a website like The State of the Game can reveal the ridiculous endorsements that have cropped up in the ‘beautiful game’. In the realm of cars alone, Alex Ferguson, staunch socialist, and his ringing endorsement of Audi is a sign of things to come.

The Trophy Presentation

“They’re not going to hand the trophy over to the old woman”. But they did. Then they asked the owners gathered on the platform how they managed to achieve this victory. All the while, the players who had just performed in the match and won the trophy got a fleeting glimpse and touch as it passed them by. To top the entire incident off, they asked the ownership group how they achieved the spectacular victory, and they had the gall to respond in any manner other than “we sat and watched the people we appointed”.

This is akin to Manchester United winning the FA Cup, and the trophy bypassing the entire team, including the winning goalscorer, in order to be handed to the Glazer family. Gabriel Clarke then saunters over to them, and asks them how they achieved this victory.

“Well, what we did is took one of the world’s most profitable football clubs, and plunged them into hundreds of millions of pounds of debt,” reply the Glazers, beaming all the while, “and following this, we signed endorsement deals with all and sundry, allowing us to turn a profit whilst simultaneously servicing the mountain of interest that needs to be dealt with annually. Then, incidentally, we had a decent manager and some players, but they aren’t important.”

The day when a chairman gets handed the League Cup after a their team’s victory, rather than just placing a medal around the manager’s neck, is the day that football dies.

American Football is a series of set-pieces

People often mock Stoke City by saying they play a particularly attractive brand of rugby. The reality is they do not, but parachute that team out to America, double it, and they may just be able to play the national sport. It is odd to have that much downtime in a sporting event, and you come to realise, when watching it, that the entire matter is built around well-practiced runs and plays that involve little or no personal ingenuity. That is not to say that these men should not be considered impressive athletes, but it does explain why the sport is impenetrable for many in the UK. If a player does not follow the paths laid out for him, he will find himself unreachable by the Quarterback. It is hard to imagine all of Gareth Bale’s runs being plotted by Redknapp in advance and it may just be this contrast we find most baffling of all.

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Forget Mariappa, the signature Newcastle must now secure is Captain Coloccini

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With the January transfer window meandering to a close last night, Newcastle fans are today breathing a sigh of relief at making it through without losing any of their major assets. However, the failure to bring in much needed defensive cover is, for some fans, a cause for concern. With the club unable to reach an agreement with Watford on the valuation of central defender Adrian Mariappa, the centre back position looks worryingly threadbare should the likes of Williamson and Coloccini join Steven Taylor on the sidelines for an extended period of time. James Perch, many people’s man of the match in the FA Cup defeat to Brighton, is of course able to fill in at the centre of defence for a few games, but over a prolonged period of matches it is surely essential to have a natural centre half, someone who knows the position and is not learning it as they play. These concerns are certainly valid, and should not be dismissed lightly.

Nonetheless, the fact remains that, second half capitulation against Fulham notwithstanding, Newcastle’s centre half pairing of Williamson and Coloccini is up there with the best in the league, an effective combination of aerial prowess and guile. Against Bolton, QPR, and most notably Manchester United, they have looked almost impenetrable. It is Coloccini, though, a leader on and off the field, who has impressed most this season. Before injury ruled Steven Taylor out for the rest of the season, and brought to an end his partnership with the curly-haired Argentine, Newcastle had one of the tightest defences in the league, conceding only 8 goals in 11 unbeaten league games. Coloccini was at the centre of everything good defensively. Imperious against Everton, undaunted under the usual aerial bombardment away to Stoke and even faultless in a 3-1 defeat to Manchester City – with 2 of City’s 3 goals coming from the penalty spot, after a clumsy challenge from Hatem Ben Arfa and a handball from Ryan Taylor, whose earlier mistake also led to City’s first.

Coloccini has been one of the league's most impressive defenders so far this season

What has also sometimes gone unnoticed is the way in which other players’ performances seem to have been raised when playing alongside Coloccini. Ryan Taylor is the perfect example of this, having excelled at left back early in the season, despite openly admitting to not being a natural in the position. This showed at times, with the versatile midfielder often caught out of position or making silly mistakes. These rarely proved costly, however, as Coloccini’s excellent reading of the game meant he was almost always there to snuff out danger when it arose. The Newcastle captain’s excellent communication and leading of the line must also have made it easier for Taylor to cope defensively in a position he was learning as he went along.

It is of great concern to fans, therefore, that Coloccini’s contract expires at the end of next season, something which calls to mind a similar situation last year with Newcastle’s star defensive performer from last season, Jose Enrique. A refusal to enter contract negotiations and the opportunity to join a club seemingly on the rise in Liverpool led to his departure in the summer, an outcome that fans will be hoping doesn’t repeat itself this time round. The signs this time, it would appear, are positive. Stories in this morning’s Journal suggest that Coloccini’s agent is due in Tyneside to discuss the terms of a new five and a half year deal. A long contract for a 30 year old, but one that is a just reward for one of Newcastle’s star performers this season, as well as one that offers a potentially high resale value – something that will not be lost on the owner. If such reports prove to be true, and Coloccini signs on for the long term, then Newcastle may have made their shrewdest signing yet.

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Why Grayson’s sacking is hard to countenance

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“The third year is fatal” said Bela Guttmann, with regards to managers, cited often enough that it is has fallen into the football manager’s psyche. The dressing room loses respect for the manager. The manager gains an affinity for certain players above others, form or class aside. Opposition figure out how to deal with any tactics or innovations the manager initially brought to the table. Pep Guardiola, arguably the crafter behind one of the greatest teams of all time, is constantly on the verge of quitting the Barcelona job every summer. Last year, after winning the Liga BBVA and the Champions League once again, most in the media were gearing up for his departure. It therefore comes as little surprise that a mere month after his three month anniversary at the club, Simon Grayson, now ex-manager of Leeds United, has left Elland Road.

Last night (31st January 2012), Leeds United capitulated at home to Birmingham, losing 4-1 almost single-handedly to a striker who has only scored 8 goals this season. This despite the fact that reports from the ground suggested that the first half performance was one of the best Leeds have had for a long while. This is the truth of the latter part of Simon Grayson’s reign. This season, and during the back-end of last season, Elland Road has not been a particularly wonderful place to watch football.

There was a moment a week and a half ago, as Leeds played Ipswich, that one felt Grayson had lost anything that he may once have had. The day was windy, and any manager with slight tactical nous would have recommended the ball remain on the floor. Any ball sent upfield by goalkeeper or defender would get caught in the wind. Yet Leeds came out of the tunnel and, like most performances this year, the strikers found themselves confined to challenging defenders in the air. Admittedly, Leeds managed to win the match 3-1, but this was exclusively due to the capitulation of the Ipswich back line, and the granting of a red card to his former team by usually sturdy goalkeeper Alex McCarthy. Fans driving away from the ground last night would be caught up in a temporary surge of optimism, but by the time the radio phone-in had begun, it was clear that the fans’ discontent had not been assuaged by the result. There were clear faults with Grayson’s approach in their eyes.

This is the man, however, that lead Leeds United to Old Trafford as a League One side, and won. This is the man, however, that lead Leeds United to White Hart Lane as a League One side, and managed to take a draw. This is the man, however, that lead Leeds United out of said League One. A manager who achieves these results is clearly not bad at his job. Managing players of the quality at his disposal to a victory against Man Utd takes an incredible amount of tactical and motivational awareness. This is why it becomes hard to countenance his sacking. Clearly the ability is there, and somewhere along the way he has lost it.

Rumours have emanated from Elland Road for the past year or so that Grayson has lost the dressing room. The manner in which he freezes out players after a single bad performance, leading to them rotting in the reserves, and never getting an appearance in the first team no matter how much they are suited for the job necessary, is clearly not conducive to a harmonious club. Word that Grayson’s affair, reported in the red-top media, led to him losing favour with Ken Bates and Bates’ wife was rife. The manner in which Grayson dealt with Andy O’Brien, chastising him and saying he would never play for him again, yet back-tracking when depression turned out to be at fault for his refusal to play again for the side, revealed plenty about how Grayson worked with his players.

This might be where Grayson, the man who did so well for Leeds a mere two years prior, fell down. As Guttmann said, the third year is fatal, and particularly key to Grayson may be the thoughts the dressing room had about him towards the end. Leigh Bromby’s wife posted on Facebook immediately after the sacking that it was “karma”, and simply said “good riddance”. Bromby clearly brought work back home with him.

The ability was, therefore, there at one point, but it has since been lost. This is why Leeds fans have hung onto positivity towards Grayson, despite the falls. It must be said that Grayson could probably sustain success for longer under a Chairman that does not treat the playing side of the club with such contempt. Grayson, however, in the end, is to blame, possibly for not leaving earlier. His replacement, awash with innovation, will probably get more out of a team of players coveted by Premier League sides. The real shame to Leeds fans that remember the football played in the early days, is that Grayson simply did not learn the lessons of Guttmann.

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